OMFG people! I just had a conversation with someone from Expedia who is without question the STUPIDEST person I’ve ever spoken with IN MY LIFE. No seriously. I’ve had more intelligent conversations with the DOGS. The woman was stupider than a bag of hammers and had this annoying, whiny voice and kept saying OK.

Me: Yeah, I just booked a flight and noticed in the confirmation that my children are listed as adults. I need them listed as children so I don’t have problems with checking in at the airport.
Expedia bag of hammers: Yes um, ok, so how old are you?
Me: Who me?
Expedia bag of hammers: Yes.
Me: (WTF?!?!) I’m 38, why?
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok. (no explanation) Can I have your confirmation number?
Me: XXXXXX
Expedia bag of hammers: So that’s XYXXXY?
Me: No. XXXXXX.
Expedia bag of hammers: So XYXXXY?
Me: No… still XXXXXX.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok, so I see the reservation. How old are they?
Me: 7 and 10
Expedia bag of hammers: Just bring their ID to airport. Do they have ID?
Me: Do you mean, like, do they have a drivers license?
Expedia bag of hammers: Well, yeah, something like that, or an ID card?
Me: An ID card?!? Look, I travel ALL THE TIME and I’ve never had to show their ID at the airport when traveling domestically. (unsaid: You LAZY BIOTCH! JUST CHANGE IT!)
Expedia bag of hammers: Well I’ll make a notation here in the computer.
Me: That’s not going to help me at the airport.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok so how old are they?
Me: 7 and 10.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok so are you old enough to travel with them?
Me: Yes. I’m their mother. (THIRTY EIGHT, REMEMBER?!)
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok. So just go to the airport and bring their ID.
Me: No. I need it changed in the system. I’m going to have all kinds of problems if they’re listed as adults.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok so how old are they?
Me: Still 7 and 10.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok, so do you want to book your seats?
Me: NO! I WANT TO CHANGE THEIR AGES!
Expedia bag of hammers: How about the meals?
Me: I ALREADY TOOK CARE OF THAT!
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok, well just bring their IDs to the airport.
Me: I NEED you to get this changed. I’m not bringing their ID to the aiport. I NEED THEM LISTED AS CHILDREN.
Expedia bag of hammers: Ok, so I’m going to put you on hold and call the airlines. I’m also going to send them an email. I’ve noted it in your reservation.
(on hold for 15 minutes)
Expedia bag of hammers: They’ve already received my message and it’s all taken care of.

Me being the SKEPTICAL person that I am, decided to call the airlines JUST IN CASE.

Me: Hi, I just booked a flight on Expedia and noticed that my children are listed as adults. They’re 7 and 10. The lady at Expedia told me it was all taken care of but I don’t trust that she took care of it. She was an idiot. Told me to have my 7 and 10 year old bring their drivers licenses to the airport.
Continental Airlines: So many 7 and 10 year olds HAVE their licenses too. Ok what’s the confirmation number?
Me: XXXXXX
Continental Airlines: (silence) Uh. They’re still listed as adults.
Me: Sigh. There’s not even a notation is there?
Continental Airlines: …..No.
Me: Can YOU change it for me?
Continental Airlines: (laughs) Yes. Here we go. 7 and 10 you said?…..