I got a funny phone call from my Dad the other night and have been giggling about it ever since. Two of my siblings have had babies over the last couple of months. My sister had her baby on Valentine’s Day and my dad was complaining about the discharge from the hospital and the conversation went like this:
Dad: “It took us three hours to get out of there!”
Me: “Why three hours? That seems excessive.”
Dad: “Well first they have all this paper work, then they gotta check the carseat and then it took them another two hours to get the LoJack off.”
Me: “The WHAT?”
Dad: “The LoJack. I don’t know what it’s really called, but it’s like the thing they put on cars. You get too close to any hospital door with it on the baby and all kinds of alarms go off and then it locks every door in the hospital. Total hospital shutdown.”
(You should know that at this point I was wondering if he knew this from experience.)
So here I am thinking how hilarious it is that they’re saying the baby was LoJacked and couldn’t wait to blog it. I was going to link to LoJack site and be all smart ass about it. But the universe has a sense of humor too. Because when I went to the LoJack website? It turns out that they really do make people LoJacks. I have to admit that was certainly a little disappointing because I was totally going to roll with that. I did learn that they make a LoJack for Alzheimer’s and dementia patients though. I’m totally going to LoJack my Grandma now. I wonder if they offer some kind of OnStar service with that?
February 24, 2009 at 1:59 pm
LOL thank you! I’m laughing so hard I’m crying.
February 24, 2009 at 2:01 pm
Emerald- I try. ;D Although I admit half my material was stolen by the actual existence of baby LoJacks. ;D
February 24, 2009 at 2:13 pm
Holy cow that’s funny!!
I wassss actually wondering how your dad knew so many details. But I wasn’t gonna say anything….
bwuah-ha-ha!!
February 24, 2009 at 2:14 pm
Ms. H- LOL! I didn’t ask. ;D
February 24, 2009 at 3:11 pm
I’m thinking Steve way want to take a close look at any presents he gets from you in the near future. At least those that are clothing or likely to be carried with him on trips.
February 24, 2009 at 3:12 pm
What are you talking about? I’ve already got GPS glued into his shoes.
February 24, 2009 at 4:06 pm
Girl, where have you been?! The hospital for my 12 year old had lowjack or a form of…
Supposedly they hid sensors in diapers and bracelets since they had a baby stolen at that hospital at Berkeley the year before we had our eldest.
Glad to see you blogging again.
February 24, 2009 at 4:36 pm
I gave birth at Stanford both times. They never had any lojack!
Alfred is pressuring me.
February 24, 2009 at 5:33 pm
That is hilarious!!!
Punky did have a bracelet that set off alarms if he left the hospital floor. (not that I would know that it worked….we didn’t have to test it..but there was no highjacking of our Jack! He was too big at 11 lbs! People wanted an infant…not a 3 month old!)
WELCOME BACK!
February 24, 2009 at 6:00 pm
So I was at the sucky hospital is what you’re all saying then?!
Son #1 was 9+ lbs. and I know what you mean. He wore the newborn size for like, 11 days. Everyone thought he was several months old. He didn’t even lose weight in the hospital, he gained!
February 25, 2009 at 7:09 am
Maggie was born at home, and it would have cost way to much to install the LoJack solution to our house. Although it might have had knock on uses for Bart now
February 25, 2009 at 10:36 am
LOL! I’m seriously considering LoJacking son #1. And I’ll need some sort of voice and sound.
February 25, 2009 at 9:19 pm
Of course I am pressuring you to blog. DO you have any idea how boring the blogosphere has gotten lately? I blame you for not setting a good example.
February 26, 2009 at 11:29 am
My son was 10 pounds when he was born. I heard someone at he hospital ask “I wonder why they had to bring that baby back to the hospital?” the day after he was born.
February 26, 2009 at 3:10 pm
You have my Facebook status to keep you entertained.
LOL! Someone said something similar about my son too.
February 26, 2009 at 4:58 pm
Jack never fitted into his newborn stuff. He was 9lbs half an ounce but was so tall he was really skinny, apparently the average babys about 53cms long, Jack was 59!!!!! W=I remember bursting into tears when after 40 hours of contractions resulting in an emergancy section the midwife decided she’s have to cut the feet off his little new baby outfit lol
As for LoJack, we had something similar I think its a brilliant idea! We had something similar when I had my two, it was a tag that fitted inside thier clothing, brilliant idea until you got a sleep deprived new mum who’d taken it out the clothes when she was changing the baby and had forgotten to put it back in and just stuffed it in her dressing gown pocket lol
(Not that I know ffrom experience either! lol;) )
February 28, 2009 at 11:53 pm
I am very familiar with the hospital baby LoJacks-especially since when we had Janie it was broken. About every 20 minutes the alarms would go off and the doors would slam shut and you’d get trapped in your room or in little boxed off areas in the hallway.
Good times.
I’m glad you’re back-I’ve been hoping for a new blog for a while.
Of course I also have ulterior motives…would you be up for letting me interview you by email for my new little blog? Check it out and drop me an email if you’re interested.
March 1, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Nemma- Oh my goodness! That’s REALLY long! Is he still really big for his age?
SUUUUUREEEEE it wasn’t you! ;D
Hi Wife- LOL! That sounds fun!
What’s the url of your blog?
March 1, 2009 at 11:44 pm
I don’t know why my name didn’t link to me, but I’m kind of new so maybe user error?
Anyway, you can see my blog at http://notyourmamaskind.wordpress.com/
If you think that you’re interested in doing an interview for me, my email is listed on the site.
March 2, 2009 at 10:22 am
The Wife- No, it didn’t show up for some reason. Thanks! I’ll check it out!
March 5, 2009 at 5:32 pm
He’s not 4 until June but is well into aged 4-5 years clothing. Yeah he’s still very tall and looks a lot older than he is! He towers over a fair few of his nursery friends
The midwives measured him twice as they didnt believe that a baby that huge could fit into someone as short as me (Im 5′3)lol
Even when the midwife came to visit us when we got home she remeasured him saying the hospital staff must have got it wrong…. She soon took it back!
He was super tall but super skinny too
March 6, 2009 at 11:09 pm
LOL! I’m 5′4.5″ and when I was giving birth to son #1 and he was crowning, I kept insisting that he somehow had a foot in my lungs. They didn’t believe me until they saw him and the doctor said, I guess that really was his feet! LOL!