One of my many super powers is the ability to detect in minute detail when someone is acting suspicious. Especially in a retail environment. I don’t know if it was my many years working for Neiman Marcus and Nordstrom or whether I had this ability beforehand. I neither have to be looking around nor paying attention. I just suddenly know if someone is acting suspicious.
So on Sunday we were at Fred Meyer. And I was shopping for socks for son #2, son #2 was sitting on the floor reading a book and son #1 and Steve were shopping for socks for son #1. I was trying to figure out how much the socks were when my spidey senses started tingling. I looked up and realized that I had somehow been keeping track of people that walked by and one fellow had just made his second pass. I looked up and immediately knew he was NOT shopping. So I inched closer to son #2 and started paying attention to this fellow. Within minutes I realized he was watching either me or son #2. So I moved within inches of son #2. I also made eye contact with this guy because often that will deter an attacker. He moved on but I knew he was coming back. Less than five minutes later I caught him peeking from behind a display and looking at me and son #2. I calmly knelt down in front on son #2 and said quietly “Look at me. If someone grabs you, start yelling stranger and bite. Kick, punch, fight like hell but make sure you keep yelling STRANGER. There’s a guy here who isn’t acting right and might try to grab you.” He closed his book and stood up. I got Steve’s attention and told him what was happening. Neither of the boys had seen the guy but we went over one more time the stranger danger rules.
I have to say that two years ago, before I started martial arts, I would have been absolutely terrified. The biggest benefit of martial arts is that I no longer live in fear of what someone might do to me. I knew that Steve and I could easily take this guy down although I’m pretty sure he weighed more than both of us put together. We put the kids in between us and started moving towards the exit. As we’re in line to check out, he passes by us again and is hanging out about 10 feet away trying to appear like he’s shopping, but he’s not. While I’m trying to determine if he has a weapon, Steve asked the cashier if he works for their security department. And, alas, he does. I informed her that security was supposed to be invisible, not scaring the hell out of the customers. 
I told you my super power was detecting when people are acting suspicious, not what their intentions are.
March 4, 2009 at 1:09 am
I don’t know whether to laugh or sigh in relief.
I’m glad you’re all okay and that you could have taken him if he hadn’t ended up being a security guard!
March 4, 2009 at 4:39 am
I so wish you had taken him out.
These Guys are creepy … they just get to justify their creepiness by getting a job being creepy. It just sounds like this guy was less good at covering it up!
March 4, 2009 at 7:41 am
Girl, you are gonna give yourself a heart attack one day.
Okay, I could have told you that was security? Why? My super power is guilt.
Got caught shoplifting as a kid in elementary school. At grocery store, unsupervised, parents had no clue where I was which was with friend who my mom was supposedly providing day care for…different times, my friend.
Anyhoo, we got caught. They released us but my father, besides beating me, decided they should fake having me “booked and finger printed.” Then I wasn’t allowed in stores for one year. If they went into a store as a family, I had to sit in the car, alone, cold, and scared.
Big deterrent and to this day, I always feel guilty and feel like I am being watched in store a as thief.
When I enlisted in the army, I believed their story so much I told them when I signed my contract that I had a record and they had to do a through background check before looking at me like I was crazy because nothing came up for stealing a purple lip gushers, blue eye liner, bag of m&ms , and romance novel.
They took me anyway.
So you look for phantom child stealers and I look just guilty. What a pair.
I need you to kung fu my guilt, m’kay? After almost 30 years? It needs to go.
March 4, 2009 at 10:22 am
Wife- I have zero doubt that we could have taken him out. Unless he had a weapon. Then it would have been a different fight.
Mr. Geek- The security people at Neiman’s and Nordstrom are completely invisible. Most of them are either cops picking up some extra hours or ex-cops who have retired. They’re good at their jobs. Even a thief wouldn’t notice them. After this experience I realized that Fred Meyer probably can’t afford to hire good people and doesn’t train the ones they do hire. I think this guy thought he was playing cops and robbers. And because he was continuing to watch us like that, I’m not altogether certain he was just doing his job. He was hella creepy.
Scouty- LOL! That’s a funny story! Did I ever tell you the story of when I was 13 there were two abduction attempts on me? It kinda shapes the way you think.
Oh and you start paying attention to creeps! Ok I’ll Kung Fu your guilt. HI YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
March 4, 2009 at 3:45 pm
What a sorry-ass jerk! Just the thought of that guy tracking me?? Makes me want to start chunking big, HEAVY hardcoverbooks at him!
March 4, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Ms H- I’m going to pretend that the guy was just not trained. You’re taught to “profile” shoppers and we did not meet the criteria for even arousing the interest of security. What’s really creepy is that he was watching my eight year old. READING. He’s not stealing! He’s READING! That is effin creepy!
March 5, 2009 at 12:48 am
You shoulda kicked the shit outta him anyway. Just for being creepy.
March 6, 2009 at 9:19 pm
Somewhere there is a blog post by a man talking about how he spotted a suspicious woman with a young boy in the store. He’s be writting about how he checked her out from several angles but was unable to figure out exactly what she was up to.
March 6, 2009 at 11:04 pm
Beth- I know! Right?
Alfred- LOL! He’s probably saying I looked pissed like I was gonna kick his ass. LOL!
March 8, 2009 at 2:15 pm
Just come out – no filters – and ask him, “Are you security or a pedophile?”
With three trained killers in a public space, you have mass, synchronization and terrain to your tactical advantage (and probably a few more tenets of the battlefield which I cannot recall at the momemnt) and you could have taken him if things got dicey.
March 8, 2009 at 2:23 pm
I’ve always got the element of the surprise too.
No one EVER expects sweet little me to hit them in the face while I’m smiling. 